Life In Da Hood

Life In Da Hood

By:
I.L.Greene

Iz drivz a Benz and Iz stay in da hood.

Iz getz a welfare check and Iz  be livin' good.

Iz haz 6 baby by 5 babymama

Fo stay here and one in Bahama.

Iz quitz 7th grade when Iz wz 20

Iz aint needin' mo school cuz Iz gotz plenty.

Iz getz tattoos wit my child supote money

If any left Iz goz out wit my honey. ("ho" didn’t  rhyme here)

Da ho tink Iz be da greatest ting.

It could be cuz she be only 13.

She say when she groz up she wantz to drive a Benz.

But fo now getin' a welfare check is the trenz.

                                                              7-12-10

The worst resturant in Charlotte...so far!

I have worked in the food industry and with customers long enough

to know how to deal with a problem or how to try and make a bad

situation go away. Not a virtue of the folks a the Village Garden on

W.T. Harris Blvd.

I went there to eat on two different occasions. The first time was for

lunch with a good friend of mine.

The Slam Dunk: Skill vs Oh boy look at meeeee!

I suppose there is a time and a place for almost anything. There was once a time

when I thought a dunk was kind of cool. But that only lasted for about 15 seconds

and that was back when I was 8 years old. At that point I realized if I was that tall

or the goal was only 9 inches above my out-reached hand  ANYONE that's not in

a comma could dunk a basketball. So after that the "dunk" seemed to me as a 

show-off, hot dog, bad showmanship, egotistical and in many cases an unsportsmanlike ploy!

But a 30 footer nothing but net, that impress me all day long! 

I have had many conversations about this topic over the years and there have

been many different opinions about it. I remember one discussion with a dude

that worked in my building and his view was that it took, "great skill" for a player

to dunk the ball. My response was that if my grandmother was that tall I'm sure

that she would be able to dunk it too. That didn't go over very well with him to say the

least.

I have decided there are some exceptions to my rule which includes players like

Mr. Mugsy Bogues and a handful of others like him. That is one feat that really

amazes me! For a short man like them to jump that high definitely impresses me.

I came up with a suggestion that seems to me to be more sportsman-like is that

only the players that are no taller than 5' 10" are allowed to dunk during a game

other wise no point is allowed. I also think that most of the hot-dog players that

dunk now will not be able to control their urges or their primeval instincts in

attempting to impress onlookers or to fulfill their desire of appearing dominate

thus forgoing the points for the team. I think their reply might be something like,

"but I looked good doing it." Well maybe to you and a handful of other

prima donnas like you, or the totally uncoordinated people and of course...

your mama.

Well that's what I think and I'm sticking to it!

MORE LATER

Clown Uniforms: Then and Now

I don't know anyone who doesn't enjoy seeing a clown, well...a real one anyway! I remember when I was a kid they would always make me laugh.

The way they wore their clothes it was always funny. The way they acted that was funny too, but it was supposed to be! There was a time when one of the kids in my forth grade class had a birthday party and they hired a clown to come and put on a show for us. It was one of the funniest things I had ever seen.

There was the time I went to the circus and the clowns were there  all over the place. Riding in little cars, riding on bicycles, falling down, chasing each other, shooting funny guns at each other you name it and they were doing it, and it was funny!

Looking back if I had to pick out one single thing that I thought made them funny, I would have to say it was the "uniform"! Without the uniform they were just grownups acting silly and silly is not always funny.

I have noticed more and more these days that there are a lot of clowns walking our streets. I have seen lots of them at the malls too. I have even seen them working at fast food restaurants and I have observed bunches of them down at the courthouse, I can only imagine what for!
 I don't know if it is the slow economy or what, why so many clowns are out of work not doing what clowns normally do. Although these make me laugh too.

 No matter where I see one they still crack me up. Now  when I see one I point at them as I am laughing so they know they have earned someone’s laughter.

I'm sure that is what they want after all, isn't it? I have also noticed that the clowns of today are a lot like the ones of old like, riding in little cars, riding on bicycles, falling down, chasing each other, shooting funny guns at each other. You name it and they are doing it. But now they are doing it in our streets and ghettos and it's not for fun!

What would you expect when their role models they fashion their clothes-style from is that of an inmate in prison. Someone that has already been a failure to themselves in addition to their families and humanity! Yeah, that's who I'm gona look up to and say, "I want to be just like them!"

 I'm sure you have seen many of these 21st century clowns although I have included a picture for reference. I don't know if you find these clowns funny but, excuse me while I laugh!

It's not WI$E to buy a new car!

                                        

    I own a body shop and I drive a '94 Escort. A lot of people I know laugh at me, for not driving a nicer car. I tell them it's paid for. It does the same thing all the other cars do... it takes me from point A to point B. As I look around and see all the people that have new cars and can't really afford them it seems sad knowing what they could do with that money, not to mention the interest alone that they are throwing out the window.

Let's say the car costs $300. a month X 12 months for X amount of months that is a lot of money. Then the higher cost of insurance because it's a newer car, now add that. My car cost me $700. once and the insurance was rock bottom because it was a worthless car. You can see how much I save per year on those factors alone. Now I know that not everyone can feel comfortable in a car that old but, there must be a "middle of the road car" somewhere out there for you! Just think about it, there are hundreds of cars you pass on the way to work that are paid for and are much older than the one you drive. A lot of people will say that those cars break down and “I need" one that is more reliable. Next time you get a chance drive over to a dealership near you and look in there service department. Every car in there is probably less than five years old. The way I figure it is can I spend that same $300 plus on my car every single month of the year and year after year? I think we all know the answer to that. That's what I think and thank you for your time.

Where I'll never eat BBQ again and it's not the BBQ.

I have been known to travel for good BBQ as will a lot of BBQ lovers. This place was one of the best I have ever found. If you went there for lunch the building was packed. So I started to go after the lunch crowd had left so I could take my time and get better service too. It was a dreary atmosphere in the dining room with no windows and the lights were always dim. I don't remember why I started eating there but it was the best BBQ around.

After a year or two I noticed that the bbq prices had become marginal on being practical. So, I started ordering a less expensive item, the Brunswick stew. They had the best by far I had ever tasted.

Over the years I would stop in ever few weeks by myself and sometimes with a friend or two and I would have the stew while my party would have the “Q”. It was then that I first noticed that the guy at the register, (the owner) would often make mistakes on the amount of the check, always to his favor. If we caught it he would always apologize and we would pay and leave. I was in with a friend that had never eaten there before and as we finished I suggested we tally the check. I pointed out to my friend that the register guy will probably charge too much and we should already know how much we were to pay. Sure enough, he charged too much and I looked at my friend and spoke loud enough for some of the other patrons to here, “I told you he would charge too much!” Nothing was said by register guy just an apology. He corrected the check took our money and we left.

    
   I never took anyone there again although not long after that I went and I ordered the stew as usual and as I took my first bite I thought it had a “odd” flavor. I had been eating this stew for years and I knew the taste explicitly and for it to have an “odd” taste was enough for red flags to go up. I called over the waitress and declared that the stew was not good. She said no problem and she would get me another bowl. Taking my bowl away she went through the swinging doors to the kitchen and soon returned with another bowl and set it in front of me and affirmed that the cook had just made it this morning. So I took a bite and it had the same “odd” flavor. I can’t say for sure, but it did remind me of the smell I have experienced while in a restroom. Then I looked over at the kitchen door and noticed the cook sheepishly peering out at me. That’s when I had a very strange feeling. I wonder if he and the register guy put something in my stew as to get back at me for embarrassing him when I was last in. No…they wouldn’t do that would they? Maybe if… no, I can’t believe that anyone would do such a thing! So, I’m just going to leave it up to you. What do you think?

    
   If you ever go there to eat and the register guy charges you too much…maybe you shouldn’t say anything if you by chance ever plan on returning!

"The Hickory House"    North Tryon Street.   Charlotte, N.C.

What I say about you behind your back is none of your business!

   Once a guy told me that everyone talks about everyone. So why would you think that just because you are friends with a person and you both gossip about other people, as soon as you are not around, that person is gossiping to someone else about you. You do it! Right? So why would you think they don't? The main thing is that most of it is totally harmless. You would never hear about it anyway. What I'm trying to say is if you do gossip try to keep it to a minimum and remember that a lot of friends have been hurt and lost because of it over the years. Keep your friends close and keep your tongue to yourself on these matters and we will all be better off, don't you think?

MORE LATER!